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By King Hippo - Posted on 19 February 2011

King Hippo's Best Movies of 2010

1.True Grit - It was hard for me to look at this film from an objective perspective as it's so close to the original which I loved. The superlative acting is what did it for me. And that sadistic rapist look when Josh Brolin first lays eyes on Hailee Steinfeld at the river - reminds me of the look Dan Cedar gives to every passing flock of sheep during a road trip.

2.Inception - As complex and detailed a movie that this was, it was still easy to follow as long as you paid attention. The editing and special effects were unbelievable. This blows away Christopher Nolan's previous Dark Knight.

3.The Fighter - Surrealistically realistic. I guess that goes along with "based on a true story." Generic story but great acting and pacing. Christian Bale's best acting job yet. King Hippo’s man crush continues…

4.Stone - This kind of flick is the only thing that gets my ass into a movie theater nowadays. Original story, awesome acting (even by Milla Jovovich - gasp!), and the psychological tension brewing behind the scenes. Edward Norton's best performance since American History X. This would have been a perfect Coen Brothers production. Or as Dan Cedar calls it…No Country For Movies With Endings.

5.Get Low - Ahh, the dying art of the Black Comedy. Unfortunately, I think Robert Duval is starting to be typecast as the surly curmudgeon. Geez, I wonder why I liked it…Bill Murray continues to surprise with each new role.


King Hippo’s Worst Movies of 2010

1.Skyline - This is the steaming pile of baboon excrement you get when you combine a shitty story, shitty acting, shitty screenplay, shitty directing and shitty production. BABOON SHIT! Or, as Dan Cedar says when he's at the primate cage at the zoo, "what's that smelly brown semi-solid stuff they keep throwing at me through the bars?"

2.The Expendables - Really? ANOTHER ensemble cast of fat, balding, and/or anabolic steroid taking, no acting, LOSERS? Hey jackasses! Wait a couple of more months and Ahnold will be able to get back in the saddle with you! The Losers and The A Team could have also substituted in this spot.

3.Tron: Legacy - OK, the original was a total snoozer. What makes anyone think that the sequel ALSO won't be a total snoozer?!?!? What's that? The original movie has a "cult" following? A cult of what? Paramecium?

4.Jonah Hex - WHY would anyone want to fuck up a Western? WHY? Not only that, but also a totally believable comic book character unlike the myriad of spandex wearing, crotch bulging homoerotic male "superheroes"with their effeminate boy sidekicks that have defaced the silver screen since the first Superman movie. As soon as I asked that rhetorical question, I see that Daniel Craig is starring in Cowboys and Aliens. *SIGH*

5.Black Swan - Wow, waste all that good acting on a "high class" remake of Showgirls. Brilliant idea! My mouth was agape - yawning through this snooze fest longer than the gaping moneyshots on Dan Cedar's homemade compilation of his favorite porn starlets' facials. Of course, they're all POV shots as Dan likes to imagine himself doing the dirty deed after a night of Old Crow, crystal meth and Mexican Viagra.

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