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June 2014


WASHINGTON REDSKINS TO CHANGE NAME sticky icon

(Washington D.C.) CNN anchor and host of the prime-time weekend edition of CNN Newsroom and Log Cabin Republican, Don Lemon, conducted an exclusive interview with Washington Redskins owner, Daniel Snyder, where Snyder “came out of the closet” and admitted that he had been on a drinking and marijuana binge, since fifty U.S. Senators called for the Washington Redskins to change their racially charged name. Snyder was joined on the set of CNN by longtime bowling buddy, and confidant, Walter Sobchak.

Reporter Don Lemon began the interview, “Mr. Snyder, we have learned that you want to say something very important to America. Is it true that you have finally decided to change the name of your football team?”

An agitated Sobchak interrupted, “Fuck you, Donny!! Dan Snyder will not be your or America’s punching bag anymore. Going forward, you will refer to him as the Dude. And YOU WILL speak to him with RESPECT!! AND NOT LIKE SOME FUCKING NIHILIST!!”

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PALIN PLANS FOR FUTURE - MONEY SHOT!!

Wasilla, AK - Today, soon to be ex-Governor of Alaska Sarah Palin, announced more specifics on her puzzling decision to step down from her role as governor of Alaska.

Appearing at a press conference, that was ripe with double entendre, and fully heightened in four inch red, high heels, a black pleather mini-skirt and a white, ruffled, half-unbuttoned blouse – “Caribou Barbie” as some have dubbed her, came out with ordnance ablaze.

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