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Copyright

SarcasticMovieReviews is a satirical newspaper published by Ball of Lard, Inc.

SarcasticMovieReviews uses invented names in all its stories, except in cases when public figures are being satirized. Any other use of real names is accidental and coincidental.

The content of this web-site—including text and graphics—is © Copyright 2009 by Ball of Lard, Inc., and may not be reprinted or retransmitted in whole or in part without the expressed written consent of the publisher.

SarcasticMovieReviews is not intended for readers under 18 years of age.

Editor and Publisher
Ian Specter

Contributors include:
Old Dan Cedar
Pepe LaPetite
King Hippo
The Morrigan
Abzug
Bernie Chudzinsky

New Movie Reviews Highlights

(500) Days of Summer - Aka... (700) Days in Detroit

Your humble reviewer Old Dan Cedar took my female compadre, Bibs Detroit, to this movie, on Day 699 of our relationship.

No, I am not shoveling shit at you!!

Now, let Old Dan Cedar set the scene for you.

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Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
AKA…Capitalist Spells against America’s Newest Prince

Let me say first that I was forced into seeing this movie. Showing in my town - there were no subtitled true works le art which, combined with the superior European intellect - allows a movie to be read while watched - as the great Ingmar Bergman intended them to be.

I was forced to review this Potter-head Fest by this wholly-owned Imperialist American website. While disdainfully marching into this sardine-ly-packed
30-plex ...

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The Hurt Locker - Aka…I'm Really Getting Tired of These Mother Fuckin' Ragheads

Here's a little REALITY with your morning coffee and/or crank – you Appalachian Hillbilly Fucks…Congratulations on getting your dial up connected to Al Gore’s greatest invention…

A snapshot of several days in the lives of the military heroes who enable you cock sucking liberals the ability to burn flags, ban the military from schools/cities, and provide the freedom you have for your gay parades and hippie Woodstock festivals...

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Bruno
AKA...Honestly, Honey...That IS fully erect!!

Alan Funt.
Don’t know who that is? It is Bruno’s fadder….you Myopic, Infantile, Generation Sushi, Fucking Fuck!!
I went into this movie passionate about three things:
My love of accounting.
My love of Fergie Jenkins.
And My love of any brunette woman without the herp or the aid.
But, as happened to ‘Brad’ in The Rocky Horror Picture Show….something wicked is overtaking me…
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In The News

PALIN PLANS FOR FUTURE - MONEY SHOT!!

Wasilla, AK - Today, soon to be ex-Governor of Alaska Sarah Palin, announced more specifics on her puzzling decision to step down from her role as governor of Alaska.

Appearing at a press conference, that was ripe with double entendre, and fully heightened in four inch red, high heels, a black pleather mini-skirt and a white, ruffled, half-unbuttoned blouse – “Caribou Barbie” as some have dubbed her, came out with ordnance ablaze.

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