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OLD DAN CEDAR'S BEST AND WORST MOVIES OF 2010


By Old Dan Cedar - Posted on 19 February 2011

Old Dan Cedar’s Best Movies of 2010

  1. The Kids Are All Right

    I can hear you right-winged, homophobic droids from here. Walk over to your gun safe. Open the three combination locks housing your six Glocks, your 40 cases of hollow-point bullets and your 8 blocks of C4 and throw away your hidden book (How To Pray The Homosexuality Out Of My Son For Dummies) that you bought a few years back when your 4 year old boy shamefully admitted that his favorite color was pink. Watch this magnificent movie with clever dialogue and a wonderful story arc. This movie will help you understand – they are pretty much like us – in an entertaining, thought provoking, empathetic look at a gay relationship which also begs the question - Why the fuck would anyone actually fight for the right to get married?

  1. Let Me In

    I have NEVER thought that a remake of a movie was better than the original. I still don’t, but THIS restructuring of Let The Right One In - a subtitled 2008 film from Norway about a 12 year old outcast boy that has been bullied at school and his budding relationship that develops with a new neighborhood friend – played by Chloe Moretz - is just as good as the original. And that’s a hard hurdle to hurdle. The setting in this version has moved to Los Alamos, New Mexico. It’s haunting, yet naïve, and will touch you with its relatability to the unrelatable. To only describe this as a horror movie is a disservice. But horrified – you will be.

  1. Toy Story 3

    All of the movies in my Best of 2010 list have one thing in common – relatability.I saw something of myself, someone or some event that I have known in each – and TOY STORY 3 is THE most relatable of all of my favorites of 2010. Toy Story 3 is a coming of age movie – Andy is moving off to college. Leaving his home and the people and the things he loves from the place and time that he has to move beyond – to grow up. Sentimental, yes, but wrapped with an almost nightmare-like quality of the loss of childhood and as a parent – having to let go of your kids as they grow up and away. If there is a knock on the movie – it’s the money-grab of unnecessarily making this into a half-ass 3D movie. But the story is wonderfully moving.

  1. The King’s Speech

    Brilliant performances by Geoffrey Rush and Colin Firth carry the movie. To be honest, it plays a little bit like a sports movie – with the culminating moment of the newly crowned king – having overcome his speech impediment - rallies Great Britain to war against the Nazis. The problem is ‘the speech’ really isn’t that good – in fact – listen to it online at Historychannel.com. It’s brutally monotonous and for more than 7 minutes - the listener is just praying that he doesn’t COMPLETELY fuck up the speech - which he was TRULY capable. The clicking of dentures throughout the cadaverous throngs at the movie theatre - was more than enough encouragement to watch this movie on DVD – if I ever get another hankering.

  1. The Town

    I first have to explain how much I truly hate Ben Affleck, People magazine and anything that promotes the dumbassification of the American public. That being said, this is one really good movie. Robbery, murder, twists, turns and yes, literally thousands of bullets shot at Affleck’s character that never hit him. But these are just minor details. Partly written by, directed by and starring Ben Fucking Affleck. Me - enjoying this movie was like an out of body experience. I was just sitting there on the couch watching the DVD, constantly, inwardly, repeating the mantra over and over again, “This is REALLY fucking good!” I must have said it a thousand times. And here’s the kicker – Jeremy Renner was so much better in this movie – than he was in The Hurt Locker – it’s damn near irritating. There is truly something to be said for going in with low expectations.

  1. Kick Ass

    Since it’s my website – I will make an extra pick for 2010. This movie was everything that Scott Pilgrim vs The World was trying to be. Funny, irreverently taking the comic book movie genre to a new level. Nicolas Cage is FINALLY wonderful in a movie again – hilariously doing an Adam West as Bruce Wayne superhero characterization. But Chloe Moretz is a star and steals the movie. She makes two of my top movies this year and was in my top pick of 2009 – 500 Days Of Summer. Maybe there IS some hope for this generation.

Old Dan Cedar’s Worst Movies of 2010

  1. Scott Pilgrim vs The World

    Quite literally The Shittiest Movie Of All Time. Not many movies can even compete in the same category. 2009’s Where The Wild Things Are could only hold the title for one year, before this fan boy-esque, stoner fest sank to the bottom. If they could only have dropped this single movie on the BP oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico – the well would have been tapped in less than two hours - with countless hours freed up for the 24 hour news channels to find something else about which to panic. The ONLY reason I didn’t walk out of this movie – was because it was like watching the Hindenburg burn over New Jersey. The only difference is that I was rooting for people to live through THAT disaster.

  1. Black Swan

    Clearly not even in the same league as Scott Pilgrim – but Black Swan took the fun out of two of the hottest non-porn stars to ever attempt a lesbian scene. A feat which I had presumed impossible - prior to viewing the Natalie Portman/Mila Kunis dry-hump-fest. But the crux of the movie’s problem comes in the “believability” category. I didn’t think either of the two dancers looked like they could dance. It reminded me of an old movie, Ice Castles, where Robby Benson falls in love with a blind ice skater. But when you’re watching THAT movie – it has SOME credibility, because – you know – she’s fucking blind and we don’t really, ya know, EXPECT her to be a good skater. The only blind people here are the throngs of critics and brain-dead minions that don’t know the difference between a pirouette and circle jerk.

  1. Ghost Writer

    Placing this movie on a Worst Movies of The Year list was almost not possible. Primarily, because the movie barely held my interest and less than two months after watching this movie – I didn’t even remember that I had watched it. Ahhh, but then in reading over the releases of 2010 – it snapped back into my brain. This movie’s story line was so implausible that it had relegated itself to the tiny spot in my brain given to one of my wife’s favorite plotted porn collections – Couples Seduce Teens. For those unfamiliar with recurring plot – the wife goes and picks up a hot “teenage” girl – takes her back to the house – seduces her – the husband walks in and abracadabra – a Ménage à troi. Maybe if they make 39 more plotted Ghost Writer movies – I can commit the plot to memory. Something about the CIA and spies. No group sex. I don’t remember getting an erection or ejaculating. Therefore, NOT GOOD.

  1. Cyrus

    My expectations worked against Cyrus. Lady Spammalot had panned this movie – TRUE. But her demarcation in 2010 that Love Actually starring Hugh Fucking Grant and Liam Fucking Neeson was” the greatest movie of all time”, followed by her Four Naybob review of Knight and Day sealed her credibility chasm. So, when she said Cyrus “sucked ass” – I thought it was some kind of “I am jealous of Marisa Fucking Tomei” rant that women of a certain age inevitably go through. Or that her date for the night kept covering her eyes through the dirty parts of the movie. Anyway, I thought that I would find any excuse to love ANYTHING with Marisa Fucking Tomei in it, because that is what guys of a certain age inevitably go through. WRONG. Lady Spammalot – my most sincere apologies! But – that doesn’t mean I can sit through ANYTHING starring Hugh Fucking Grant!

  1. Inception

    Ever since I watched Christopher Nolan’s Memento – I have been expecting greatness whenever I walk in to see one of his movies. Again, expectations…I gave M. Night Shyamalan six chances to repeat one good movie after The Sixth Sense. But I have come to the realization that these guys are in mainstream movies for a reason. They could never make it in porn. ONE money shot is all you get with these boys. Inception weighs in at 2 hours, 28 minutes and more painfully slow – it could not be. It takes a van more than twenty minutes to fall from a bridge into the water. This – and the overly bloated CGI effects goes to show you that just because you have good pedigree and a nice member doesn’t mean to can cum on command.

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