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HUGO IN 3D – Aka…Scorsese’s Terms Of Endearment

By Old Dan Cedar - Posted on 19 December 2011

You might think that a guy Martin Scorsese’s age (69) and his number of marriages (5) that he might harken back to the loves of his life that have guided him from the Mean Streets of New York to the past three dozen years or so, when his constantly thickening eye glasses and congruently budding ear hair have made it inevitable that just one woman wouldn’t be able to handle all of this tweezering on her own.

Every guy's 3D dream is different.

Old Dan Cedar harkens to the day of playing catch with his pre-dead daddy in the park.

Or paraphrasing favorite lines from Stripes’ Sergeant Hulka- out of context.

Or more likely, creating an early 80’s MTV Molotov Cocktail of VJ Martha Quinn interspliced in 3D queef-humping with the slightly tore-up Axe Goddess Lita Ford.

So, what did you expect after she didn’t get laid and got in a fight? Old Dan’s the answer man.

While King Hippo longs for the days of walking the dingy streets of Times Square with his “Uncle Madoff” exploring the live sex shops of the early 1970’s and discovering “creative ways of pilfering bread” from the homeless augmented with a 3D urination stream on random vagrants.

But, as we amp up for Hugo in 3D, we get ready for Scorsese to take us through an adventure with an orphaned boy that lives in a train station trying to reconnect to his dead daddy through an automaton. But, a complicated, great movie, just like an intricate, amazing automaton, needs to be beheld from a couple of paces

There are sooo many moving parts to this movie: From the best live action 3D to date, to a pre-pubescent love story, a boy’s longing for his dead daddy’s love, and a loving homage to early cinema. Love is not all you need, but it’s a good start.

Cause we can all see what could go awry in less talented hands of another Four-Eye-“Genius” with Woody Allen’s exertion on Midnight in Paris earlier this year. Where Allen was intent on showing his intellect by throwing-up famous artists from yesteryear…in droves…Scorsese seems effortless in his recounting the greatness of early cinema.

Scorsese’s last few gigs have been about reliving those good ole days. Whether it is in Hugo or in his Rolling Stone’s documentary Shine
The Light
, his George Harrison biography or his recent work on Boardwalk Empire…it would be easy to say that he is wrapping it up. Just keep in mind…he has already outlived the chick doing HIS biography. So, let’s don’t get too ahead of ourselves.

For all I know, Scorsese has a dozen more pair of glasses to replace and maybe another wife or two. But this I do know…at least when HIS time does come…Scorsese will be doing something he loves and is good at…unlike Dan Cedar and King Hippo…who will be doing neither.

Just remember…a few paces back, please. Otherwise you might not be able to discern the ear-hair forest - for the trees.

It’s a joke. Lighten up, Francis!!

Old Dan Cedar

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