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New Movie Reviews
By Ian Specter - Posted on 01 April 2009
- 20 FEET FROM STARDOM – Aka…The Help 2
- A DANGEROUS METHOD – Aka…Keira Knightley Gets Mind Fucked
- ARGO – Aka…So, Apparently Bryan Cranston Didn’t Have Cancer And Wasn’t Selling Meth
- CONTAGION - Aka...Ode To The 99 Percent
- DARK KNIGHT RISES – Aka…Gimp Goes Gotham
- FLIGHT -…Aka Coffee, Tea, or Immelmann Rolls, Sir?
- HANGOVER II - Aka…Of Trannies’ Tallywackers and Other Kinky Fucks
- HOUSE AT THE END OF THE STREET - Aka...The Sordid Upbringing Of Dan Cedar
- HUGO IN 3D – Aka…Scorsese’s Terms Of Endearment
- HYDE PARK ON HUDSON - Aka...Woody Woodpecker Meets Porky Pig
- IDES OF MARCH - Aka...Invasion Of The Body Snatchers
- KING HIPPO'S BEST AND WORST MOVIES OF 2012
- LINCOLN - Aka…So, The Guy That Freed The Slaves was a Republican?
- LOOPER – Aka…Why Rotten Tomatoes, CNN and Hollywood ALL Suck
- MAMA - ...Now You Know Why So Many Kids Are Fucked Up In Our Society
- MIDNIGHT IN PARIS - Aka...You Like Me...You Really Like Me!!
- MONEYBALL – Aka…Frank Costanza’s Stop-Short Move
- MOONRISE KINGDOM - Aka...Romeo and Juliet Meets Lake Wobegon
- OLD DAN CEDAR'S WORST AND BEST MOVIES OF 2016
- OLD DAN CEDAR’S BEST AND WORST MOVIES OF 2012
- OLD DAN CEDAR’S BEST AND WORST MOVIES OF 2014
- OLD DAN CEDAR’S WORST AND BEST MOVIES OF 2013
- Old Dan Cedar’s Worst and Better Movies of 2011
- PARANORMAL ACTIVITY 3 - Aka...How NOT To Shoot A Porno
- RANGO - Aka... I Got a Blow Job In This Movie
- RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES – Aka…Get Your Hands Off Me…You Damned Dirty Liberals
- SHERLOCK HOLMES - A GAME OF SHADOWS - Aka Sherlock and Watson: A Game of Homos…No Shit!
- SINISTER....Aka - Now I Remember Why I Love 8mm Snuff Films
- THE ADVENTURES OF TINTIN - Aka...The Original Indiana Jones meets Let There Be Blood
- THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN – Aka…Grease Is The Word
- THE CABIN IN THE WOODS - Aka...The Evil Dead III ( This is after the Evil Dead 2 but before Army Of Darkness...kinda like the meal between breakfast and brunch)
- THE DEBT – Aka…Jessica Chastain Makes Wood
- THE DICTATOR…Aka – The Prophet and The Pope Walk Into A Bar
- THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO - Aka ..The Sound of Music II
- THE GUARD - Aka...Why We Watch
- THE HELP - Aka...And You Thought Nell Carter Was Fat
- THE HOBBIT - Aka…We Don't Need No Steenking Guns To Kill Orcs And Goblins
- THE HUNGER GAMES - Aka...Obama's America
- THE PURGE - Aka...The Urge
- THE WOMAN IN BLACK - Aka…Daniel Radcliffe and Dan Cedar Are Identical Twins Separated at Birth
- TINKER, TAILOR, SOLDIER, SPY - Aka…Cine de Walmart
- TREE OF LIFE - Aka...Daddy's Wet Dream
- UNKNOWN - Aka...I Would Eat January Jones' Ass...Oh, Sorry. Was I Supposed To Be Paying Attention To The Plot?
- WHITE HOUSE DOWN - Aka...Ok, Let Me Get This Straight...The GOP Is The Greatest Risk To National Security? AH, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA!
- WIN WIN - Aka...Jeff Spicoli Joins The Wrestling Team
- World War Z - Aka….Ok, Just So We're Clear... Some United Nations Moron Saves The World? AH, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA!
- ZERO DARK THIRTY – Aka…Bigelow Busts Inaugural Balls
- INCEPTION - Aka...Shutter Island 2
- RESTREPO - Aka...The Hurt Valley
- TOY STORY 3 - Aka...Barbie gives Ken a Woody
- SCOTT PILGRIM VS. THE WORLD - Aka...The Shittiest Movie of All Time
- GET HIM TO THE GREEK - Aka...Spinal Tap meets Honeymoon in Vegas
- THE KING'S SPEECH - Aka...The Coronation Of Porky Pig
- KNIGHT AND DAY - Aka…Mission Impossible meets match.com and SCORES!!!!
- BLACK SWAN - Aka...Dream Fuck - Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis
- KING HIPPO'S BEST AND WORST MOVIES OF 2010
- SHUTTER ISLAND - Aka…Shitter Island
- STONE - Aka...OMG Milla Jovovich's Nipples
- OLD DAN CEDAR'S BEST AND WORST MOVIES OF 2010
- HEREAFTER - Aka…Sixth Sense Kid Finally Gets Laid*
- INSIDE JOB – Aka…Roger & Me and Baby Makes Three
- THE KIDS ARE ALL RIGHT - Aka...Hot Lesbian Sex!!
- TRUE GRIT - Aka...Same Grit - Different Day
- THE EXPENDABLES - Aka...Middle Aged Flaccid Penises Unite!
- THE FIGHTER - Aka...Rocky VII (Only Good)
- THE SOCIAL NETWORK - Aka...How To Blow A Billionaire
- GET LOW - Aka...Hermits Are Scary People